Journey Center Blog

I was recently listening to an old sermon by a previous pastor. He was addressing relationships between men and women and was talking about that often hated, misunderstood, mistreated, wrongly used, sometimes vile “s” word…the word that has made me angry and defensive and hurt and scared…

“Submit.” There I said it.

Don’t stop reading this blog. It’s not as vile as you might think.

I don’t know many people that like this word. But I think that’s because we don’t understand the meaning of it, especially as it involves relationships. And it’s been misused against women with the religious mandate for wives to submit to their husbands. I get a pit in my stomach when I hear this and want to argue that I’m every bit as capable of thinking and making decisions and doing things as a man is.

The problem with telling women to submit to their husbands is that people often leave off the part about men also submitting to their wives. If you continue reading the Bible passage where this is discussed, it equally addresses the man’s role in this act of submission. This kind of submission isn’t putting oneself under the control and dominance of another. It’s about mutual submission, people equally submitting to one another, not just husbands and wives, but all people.

My pastor put it this way, “You’ve begun to enter into mutual submission when you truly believe the others’ thoughts, feelings, opinions, ideas, needs, fears, anxieties, hopes, dreams are as important as yours are and you begin to behave accordingly. When you start doing that, you start breaking off each other’s bonds. We are not very good at breaking our own chains, but we are very good (when we want to be) at breaking off others’ chains. At encouraging, lifting up, unburdening, lightening the load…”

Wow! I feel like I could read that statement over and over. Anyone who has ever struggled in a relationship can probably see how not submitting to each other caused many problems. And anyone in a good relationship can probably see how when we truly deeply care for the needs, desires, fears, hopes and dreams of the other and treat them as if they are as important as our own, deep trust and love can happen.

I’ve experienced being in relationships that break off emotional and spiritual bonds. This kind of deep love, deep trust, and deep caring does break down my chains of mistrust, guilt and pain. And I don’t think those chains could come off any other way. I know – because I spent years trying to remove them myself!

I’ve also found that the love of God has removed many of my chains. When I understand the deep, deep love and respect between God and myself, I feel so free and unburdened. The image I love of Christ the most is the one of the humble servant. He spent his life healing people, meeting their needs, addressing their concerns, helping them with their problems. He taught them that the person who was the greatest among them was the one who was the servant of all. This image of Christ is so backwards from the concept of putting yourself first and caring for your own needs first… And definitely backwards from the idea of men sitting back smugly while the women around them submit to them.

Why do I submit myself to Christ? Because he is worth it. Because what he has to offer is something worth submitting myself to. Because he also submitted himself for me, even to the point of death. Submit myself to love? Definitely. Submit myself to wholeness? You betcha. Submit myself to the amazing transformation that comes from true, deep communion with the divine? Sign me up! Submit myself to those around me – to care for their hearts as much as I care for my own? It would be truly revolutionary!

I’ve been reading a book called “Finding God in the Questions: A Personal Journey” by Dr. Timothy Johnson. The title describes my life very well right now. For the last few years, I have been having a lot of questions about what I have been taught my whole life about God and other spiritual matters.

After watching the movie “2012” a few months ago, I started to think about the big flood described in the Bible. Did it really literally happen? If the whole world was flooded and everything died, what did the animals and people eat? Wouldn’t it take a lot of time to re-grow all the vegetation? How could a primitive boat survive that kind of conditions? These and many more are the kinds of questions I am now asking about the Bible and my faith and trying to find answers to.

I’ve had questions and doubts over the years, but never as seriously as recently. I don’t think I ever allowed myself to go there before. I was too afraid that my thoughts would lead me away from the truth. I was too afraid of how my changing ideas would change my life and my relationships with people. But I don’t have those fears anymore. And I think this process of questioning everything, seeking answers about who really wrote the Bible, what was going on around them at the time, what political and social influences might have biased what they wrote, has actually been drawing me closer to God.

I’ve been finding as Dr. Timothy Johnson writes in his book that “Doubt doesn’t have to tear down belief, however; it can purify it. When it does, the beliefs on the other side become more certain” (p. 15). By thoroughly examining what I believe about so many spiritual issues and why, I am able to make my spiritual walk my own.

I am discovering that I can approach God more in spirit, less in dogma. I don’t have to just find God in the “Holy Scriptures”, in sermons or in other people’s ideas. I can find God in the world around me, in people who may not even believe in him, in the beauty and magnificence of nature, in the sweet smile of my little niece, and in the joy of playing at the park with my dog. The Bible contains many stories of many other people’s experiences of God, but I am also free to have my own story. I am free to seek God myself and find him the way I find him. I am free to think for myself, ask him to reveal himself to me as he desires and come to whatever conclusions I come to.

All this questioning makes me so thankful for the Journey Center. I live in WA state and don’t get to be there in person very often, but when I am, I am deeply aware of how truly accepting, open, loving and freeing this place and the staff are. They accept me as I am, with all my doubts and questions and differences and love me just for me.

 Reference: Finding God in the Questions: A Personal Journey by Dr. Timothy Johnson. Dr. Timothy Johnson (M.D., M.P.H.) is the medical editor for ABC News and has reported on health-care issues for Good Morning America since 1975. He also provides on-air analysis of medical news for World News Tonight, Nightline and 20/20. (from the cover)

Today is a holiday honoring presidents. It signals the coming seasons of this time of year. Spring with Lent and Easter, tax season and then baseball season. I am very grateful for one of them and follow a team for 165 games for the other but the middle one makes me think of how I used the money that I actually made last year. “I spent that much on that?” “Wasn’t I going to save more?”
I know that getting ready for the tax person leads me to evaluate what my intentions are for this year. I want to devote more resources to make our planet a much better place. I want to give to people who are really making a difference in bringing peace and justice to those hurting on our planet.
I really don’t want to know where all that tax money is going. I will leave that up to Caesar and other presidents.

We’ve made our way through some wet and foggy weather but even in the midst of the gray blehness of it all (that’s a Snoopy term for you Peanuts followers), there are surprises awaiting us.  I walk in the vineyards every morning with two dogs.  My favorite time to be out is between 6-7a as there is still some quiet and I can imagine that the distant roar of River Rd. and Hwy. 101 is a river.  The sun rises during that hour and last week I watched the light hit the fog.  It was dense and there was condensation happening on my bangs, the air was so heavy with vapor.  Ahead of me there was an unusually bright patch of fog maybe 20′ across and 300yds. further on, another identical, glowing patch.  I lifted my eyes then and realized that the two patches were anchors to an arc that had no color, it was a “fogbow.”  The sun was behind me and the dense ground cloud was bending the light to create the arc.  I was floored and amazed!  In all of my years outdoors, I have never seen or heard of such a thing!  I stopped to take in the scene and I realized that the birds were singing  and excited.  There were two Meadowlarks trading songs with their throaty, flute-like voices, the Robins were laughing and Sparrows flitted between the rows of vines.  I thought of our Creator’s promise of no more earth-covering floods with the sign of the first rainbow and though I know the rains and fog will still permeate our late winter months, I was transported to that time of new earth emerging from the flood and life rejoicing under the arc of a bow.

This Saturday, six of us gathered for a centering prayer day at the Journey Center. Even though I have the opportunity to offer this each quarter, I continue to be amazed at the intimacy and safety that develops as people– often strangers to one another- find such deep connection by sitting together in silence dedicated to being present with the Holy. We had folks coming from a couple of different traditions– including Native American– so I was able to pray as my Cherokee teacher has taught me–to the Spirit :”You of so many names and You who cannot be named”. Out of the quiet time together, we also practiced Lectio with John 10:10; “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full”, and were overwhelmed by the richness coming out of quiet–it was like winter soil that looks so empty–and yet begins to sprout with the miracle of that pale green beauty and life. Thank you to everyone who came and opened mind and heart to the Silence, to the Holy, and to each other.

It was a foggy morning on Mt.Tam

On January 23rd I led a hike on Mt. Tamalpais as part of the Encountering God in Creation outings.  I was excited as I had never been hiking there and we had a tiny window in the weather where we had 6 whole hours of no rain during a very wet spell.  The larger group had dwindled to 4 of us and I think we were all a bit stir-crazy to get out of the house and into the woods.  Being yet green to all of the hiking opportunities here in the region, I prepare for a hike by reading about it in guide books, going online, talking to local hikers for all of the trail and logistical pieces as well as collecting some cultural and natural history to share.  Then I pray to the Creator and ask what I should build into our time together as far as encountering God in our outdoor exploration.

The prayer sat without much response for about a week until the night before.  My husband and I were sitting down to dinner at sunset and as we sat for a moment of silence before eating, God said, “Shabbat has begun…”  It was Friday night and so I asked my Jewish-born partner what his family had done for the Sabbath.  Not being orthodox, they lit candles and sang the traditional prayer and on Saturday, they would rest, read, have family time and go to Temple.  I went back to our office and pulled my copy of “Everything Judaism” off the shelf that my husband had bought me when we were dating.  I loved what I read about the Sabbath being a time to remove ourselves from the mundane things of life.  I interpreted that to mean the “to-do” lists, email, chores and the normal things that lie in wait for me on Saturdays.  In a section discussing what can and cannot be done on the Sabbath by a more orthodox Jewish household, it mentioned that work could mean anything that causes one to exert energy or engage in physical labor but a more inclusive definition included works that are creative or exercise dominion over the environment.

I looked at what our day would be like, hiking 6 miles over rolling terrain in a lush, redwood forest and thought that the outing was anything but mundane over my usual Saturday tasks.  We certainly didn’t exercise any dominion over the environment but did our best to embrace that connection with our surroundings that utilized all of the senses and marveling in the rich diversity, textures, smells and sights we ingested along the way.  We held our own Shabbat ceremony over a cup of grape juice next to a burbling stream surrounded by mossy trunks and pixie-like mushrooms.  There was a sense of the dawn of creation in that primeval forest opening and the Shekinah, or the Shabbat Queen, is greeted at sunset and stays through Saturday evening was definitely surrounding us.  I felt like I should take off my hiking boots as like Moses, I was treading on Holy ground!

“Prayer is not asking for what you want, but asking to be changed in ways you can’t imagine” (Kathleen Norris)

Nine years ago, when I turned 50, I began to say a prayer: “Great Spirit, take away from me anything that interferes with my becoming who I came here to be, so that I can do what You want me to do”. It was a scary prayer-as I had no way of knowing what would follow-but it was what came to me whenever I got quiet.  Soon after the prayer began to take up room in my heart, my spiritual director taught me Centering Prayer, and consenting to the presence and action of the Spirit in my life became a daily prayer practice. 

As someone called to and committed to the contemplative journey,  I continue to discover, sometimes to my dismay and sometimes amusement, the ways and places in which I still try to control my journey with the Holy. I hope –and pray–that at some point in this long unravelling of the false self/ego I will be brought to the place where in fact I can more fully trust and surrender. Years ago a friend who was a therapist told me that no one would undertake therapy if they fully realized what it was going to be like. I think the spiritual journey may sometimes be like that too—so I just continue to ask for help in following this mysterious path into unimaginable places . I don’t know what you are doing, Spirit, but something inside of me keeps saying YES! (My Irish Nanna would say, “God help me!)

This past Sunday we had another one of our art openings (featuring John Teague and his wonderful photographic documentary exhibit called “One Day with the Datooga”). For the first time, the Bohemian newspaper chose to feature our gallery along with an image and the editor of the paper also talked about the show on a local radio program. We had a wonderful turnout and a great time! The shows runs through February, so there is still time to come see it.

Happy New Year! As we look back on last year, we are grateful for all the relationships that we have been able to begin and nurture as the number of people who are hearing about the Journey Center continues to grow and almost daily now we are getting phone calls, emails and visits here at the Center!

December 2009

On December 21, we offered something new here at the Center: a Christ-centered gathering on the longest night of the year (the winter solstice). It was a beautiful gathering, and we welcomed over 30 people that night from various spiritual paths. It was a wonderful experience for us to all be together to light a candle in the darkness and share our prayers/desires for the year ahead!

It’s a new quarter at the Journey Center with lots of gatherings to celebrate Advent and Christmas, as well as our regular classes, workshops, contemplative gatherings, community groups, a winter retreat and more! Check out our Happenings page.

October 2009

We had our first Journey Center Passport to Adventure Fall Auction. There was live music, silent and live auctions, fantastic food, and lots of laughter and fun. Thank you to everyone who attended, helped out and donated items. You made this a wonderful evening!

August 2009

Three weeks ago, a group of 9 of us had an absolutely wonderful experience backpacking together in the High Sierras, culminating in successfully making it to the top of Half Dome in Yosemite! What an experience of community we had in the midst of the challenges of the journey… you can read about it, and the lessons we learned, in our article titled “Facing Challenges in the Strength of Community“.

Julie Miller and her team hosted a powerful event at the Center…the Human Trafficking Awareness Evening. We estimate that 75 people attended to learn about the worldwide (and local!) issues of slavery and sex trafficking and how they can make a difference in people’s lives. It was deeply touching to see such a mix of people of all ages, concerned and compassionate about understanding and helping to relieve this kind of suffering.

July 2009

As part of the “Encountering God in Creation” aspect of the Journey Center, we had a Yosemite Backpacking Trip called “Sample of the Best”.

June 2009

We are having fun every Wednesday night with our booth at the Santa Rosa Downtown Market. Stop by and visit us!

May 2009

We participated in the Human Race and raised money to support the Journey Center.

April 2009

We welcomed the local art of Suzanne Jacquot with an opening reception on April 17th and will feature her art in our gallery throughout May.

March 2009

We begin a new quarter of classes, workshops, gatherings, prayer experiences, etc. Check out our Happenings section of the website for this quarter’s schedule of events.

February 2009

We launched our new website! Our hope is to connect the spiritualy thirsty – both those who are local and able to be involved with the Journey Center and also those who are looking for more spiritual connections online.

November 2008

We celebrated the Grand Opening of the Journey Center with a party, live music, food, giveaways and introductions to all the staff at the Journey Center.

Well, here it is… my first blog ever. There have been so many firsts in my life- hundreds!- and now this one. Time once again to enter the “modern” age.   :-)

I am thinking today about how small our world has become, and how this is a good thing.

In the past few weeks, I’ve met people (through email) from all over the United States, Canada and Europe. It still amazes me that I can write a message, hit “send” and know that that person who lives thousands of miles away will receive it in just a few seconds. Wow! I don’t know if I’ll ever get over how cool that is.

And I know I’ll never get over how wondrous, miraculous and amazing it is that there is One who loves me (and you!) who is always present, always pouring out grace and kindness and help…even when all seems dark and confusing.

May we all take time today to pause for a few moments, quiet our minds and hearts and become aware that we are never alone…for there is no distance between us and God, who is near.

“I will never leave you or forsake you.”  Hebrews 13:5

Blessings,

Joanna Quintrell, Journey Center Executive Director